Dear NFL Employees that Choose The Super Bowl Halftime Performers,

Last Night, I with many other Americans, that fall into peer pressure watched Super Bowl 44. The game was ok. The Ad were Shit, but even worse was the Halftime Show. Who in the blue hell decided to have some who CAN’T SING, SING at the biggest event of the year. The Who Was absolutely awful and I am calling for the person’s who booked them, To have their head impaled on a stick and fed To a Twlight Vampire. That was the worst halftime show since last year. HOW ABOUT CHOOSING SOMEONE WHO IS RELEVANT TO TODAY’S FUCKING MUSIC. I am sick of seeing all the washed up old timers get on stage. I sit at home worrying if they are gonna have to change a colostomy bag mid song. I finally understand why The Who was picked for the halftime show. They sing every mother fucking theme For the CSI shows. Oh Boy. Does anyone really watch those? I am guessing the fan base of those show are the only people who got a hard on from seeing The Who. I can hear it now, Oh That was the theme to CSI: Miami. Oh that was the theme From CSI: NY. Oh That was the Theme from CSI: MALL COP. Roger Daltrey’s voice cracked more than Peter’s in that episode of The Brady Bunch when he hits Puberty. Next Year, How about this for the halftime show: Nickelback, Drake, And Taylor Swift. But Instead we will get The Captain And Tenille, The Sugar Hill Gang, George Jones. So To The Person who books acts for halftime, DON’T BOOK A JACKSON. ALSO, FUCK YOU.

Sincerely a turned away Halftime Show Fan,
Stick Figure Dan