In honor of people putting up 80s and 90s cartoon pictures on Facebook to get out the awareness for child abuse, I thought it would be interesting to share some of the unanswered questions of our cartoons of yesteryear. Is it just me or do they not make kids shows like they used to? I feel like the process now is so much different. Writers and creators of kids shows now have to take huge amounts of LSD and Ecstasy. Seriously, has anyone ever seen Yo Gabba Gabba. You haven’t. Color me shocked. This show is about colorful dancing robots and a guy in an orange fuzzy hat that controls them. Does that sound like something you would watch? What happened to the good ole days of people smoking weed to come up with the shows children watch. There are some questions from the toons my generation watched that I would love to have answered. Here are a few of those questions.
If Smurfs don’t have sex, what color do their balls get?
Do Smurfs have STDs, if so how many does that slut Smurfette have?
What in the fuck was in the water in Bluffington to make every character on Doug a different color?
Am I the only one that thought Patty Mayonnaise was a Lesbian?
The song Doug sings about Patty, does it not prove that somehow Doug would have killed her and wore her skin?
Does anyone else notice Mr. Krabs lives in Bikini Bottom?
What in the blue hell possessed Mr. Krabs to sleep with Pearl’s mother?
Is Sandy Cheeks channeling her inner Patty Mayonnaise? ( Which would make her a squirrel who doesn’t like nuts)
Should’t Plankton be in jail for selling Chum to fish?
Where does Spongebob get all his money to buy his shit because Mr. Krabs is such a cheapskate? ( I am guessing he is the worlds first underwater meth dealer.)
If there are 7 bad words we can’t say, What the fuck are the other 6?
Every episode of the Rugrats, the kids would end up missing. Shouldn’t one of the other parents called Family services? They couldn’t take care of their own so how in the hell could they take care of someone elses?
Can you say Phil and Lill Twincest?
Why would Popeve and Bluto fight over Olive Oyl? She’s such a slut.
Why does everyone in Springfield have jaundice?
Was the reason Arnold’s head shaped that way cause of a tumor?
Why didn’t CatDog ever ask Winslow to help pay the rent?
Where did CatDog’s shit come out of?
Does Carl from Jimmy Neutron have a beastiality fetish?
Does anyone think that Carl was banging jimmy’s mom?
Was Ginger always ragging?
Has Pepe Le Pew ever been charged with stalking?
That is all the wonderful questions that I can think of that hasn’t been answered.