I have come to a conclusion over the last few days on how to possibly find the woman of my dreams. I am going to see Magic Mike by myself. I know what you are thinking. You are going to come across looking like you are gay. That is where the plan fully swings. Ok, here is the idea. Since I am there alone, I can see if I can hang with a group of girls. Hopefully, one of them is having a birthday. That will be the girl I will become friends with. She will be vulnerable. She will think I am her best gay friend. We will go shopping for sandals at Old Navy. We will dance in a living room to some really crappy rap music. Each of us tries a booty dance. I will tell her how crappy the men in her life truly are. That will open the door for me. We will do each others nails and go sex toy shopping. Finally, after 6 months of working this plan. I will text her telling her we need to talk. I will tell her that I am thinking about being with a woman, after one failed try. I will tell her that, the only woman that I want to try with is her. Boom. She says, Hell No. Are you crazy? The one thing I get to take away from this, is that my nails look amazing. When does this plan start? Today. I have to find a woman who is celebrating the big 30. She has to get in a mood that makes it easy for me to pull this off. I know what song will set that off that quickly. MMMBOP!!!
The Buzz Kill Blog would like to wish (In our first dedication Retro Video) Amee Hall a Happy 79th or 30th birthday. I went to school in Missouri. I can’t count.
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