Well guys and gals this week has been completely amazing for my little nerdy self. I have recently discovered it is okay to have a life, I don’t have to stay cooped up in my nerd princess palace. Don’t get me wrong, I still play games like a mad woman but recently I’ve had a huge amount of other exciting things. This nerdy girl went to her first bar. Granted I should’ve done this at twenty one, but uh, twenty-four works right? I stuffed my face with tacos and watched my boyfriend get schooled at pool by his sister. I have to admit, that was pretty hilarious. Actually for the first time ever, I have been out of the house nearly every night this week. Not only did I conquer my first bar, but I also went to a football game at my boyfriend’s nephew’s high school. Unlike most nerds, I freaking LOVE football. Needless to say, I screamed my head off most of that game. I was freezing cold, but it was completely worth it. The next day I just spent the day hanging out with the boyfriend and his family. I discovered I have an undying love for screwdrivers, my already awfully clumsy balance is way worse when alcohol is involved. It has been a great fun week for this nerd. I honestly haven’t had time to game so I have a feeling next time I do I might be stuck there for days. So if anyone hears screaming across the globe, it’s probably me getting angry at the game. When I don’t play for a while, like any gamer I freaking suck, and what happens when you suck at games? Anger. Anger. Anger. Being here with the boyfriend and doing all these things has also got me on a semi-normal sleep schedule. I no longer feel the sun burning my eyes before I finally pass out. I got to bed between one or two in the morning, which is a major feat for me. Sharing the bed with the boyfriend makes for an interesting adventure though. Try sleeping while you hear snores so loud that it could probably break the sound barrier, yeah, not happening. How do I combat this? I become the blanket hog queen. The best way to get a man to stop snoring is to let him freeze his balls off. Game, set, match, dear boyfriend of mine. Game, set, match. I think this is the first week since I started this damn thing that I haven’t burnt, tripped, fell, spilled something, kicked a dog, or something like that. Oh wait, the Hoxie game…. I’ve said it before I’ll say it again. I’m probably the most clumsy girl on the planet. There’s a secret, I’m also extremely short. I’m twenty-four and a super tall four foot nine inches. No, I don’t work for Willy Wonka, I’m just cool. Imagine someone tiny, with a crutch climbing up the bleachers to watch a football game. The bleachers are higher than my short ass legs could lift. So, how did I get up there? Well, if I could have flown, that would have made it easier, but no. My boyfriend and his family were all there, so I needed help getting up. My boyfriend had one arm while his sister had the other. We attempted to have me hop up these damn things. If anyone wants to picture what that looks like, picture a live action Frogger game played in front of a live audience. The ordeal was entertaining to say the least. After screaming my head off, and Hoxie winning the game, it was time to get down. I got my cardio on that one. I conquered them like a flight of stairs on steroids. Maybe I’m a super hero? A girl can dream. What’s this weeks lesson fellow nerds? If you lack balance, don’t drink and walk, you’re going to kiss the floor. If you go to a football game and its cold and your short, wear millions of layers of clothes and learn to fly so you can make a hasty exit from the bleachers if need be. Go to a bar before you hit twenty four and never drink Coke simply because it’s gross.
The Nerdiest Girl In Existence