I have to admit, it is really fun searching the internet for some insane deals. What did we do for bargains before the days of Amazon, eBay and Buy.com? How did we look for love before the days of E-Harmony and match? Well, there is a website out there that showcases both of them in one really awesome URL. That website is Craigslist. The only website that you can buy something and trade it for a golden shower in the casual encounters section. I have searched Craigslist for the weird, the obscure and the just plain creepy. These are my findings.

4248853812-1Life-size & anatomically correct dolls

It is with much sorrow I must give away life-size & anatomically correct dolls that I purchase years ago when I lonely. I married now & wife say they must go. Please be kind to them. Their names Suzie, Sakiya, & Tenshi.

I think my heart is breaking for the real life Lars. (Go watch Lars and the Real Girl) I think the most important bit of information that one can take from this article is that he actually was able to find a wife. I guess those mail order companies will just ship to anyone, well that is how he at least got the dolls.

4220559504-1Bellybutton lint – 3 jars of it

Free collection of bellybutton lint, mostly green & red. Perfect for making that special Xmas gift, like a hand-made toque or baby socks.

There are things that in life, I feel that need not to be purchased. Somewhere on that list belly button lint is not listed. I think I have to revise my list to accommodate the fact that a man was able to keep the lint from his navel from 1984. Who in the blue hell would make baby socks out of these? Would you want your baby to smell like a navel? That is almost 30 years of lint saved up. How does one come to the point in life that they decide that they are going to save their lint? Maybe the Asian guy should trade the real dolls for the lint. I think it is fair.

And last but certainly not least….

Naughty at a Funeral – w4m

I am looking for the guy that I banged at my uncle’s funeral 2 weeks ago. We were sitting next to each other and you started rubbing my leg while trying to comfort me. You told me that I was beautiful and next thing I knew, we were walking to the bathroom. I’m really worried because you never did say how you knew my uncle and I’m freaking out that we could be related. If not, I thought maybe we could continue where we left off. Maybe it was because it was taboo, but it was so HOT. I don’t think the funeral director knew what to think when we walked out of the bathroom together. Anyways, I hope to hear from you…

I just want you all to know that this may be the greatest move that any man could have played. Find the one woman who is hot. Make sure that she is crying. Place hand on thigh. Chances are she is in a dress. Move hand back in forth, get a look from the lady and the person in the coffin isn’t the only thing stiff at this funeral. However, this could be the worst play in the history of man because knowing their luck, he is actually her long lost brother. Doesn’t family sit all together at a funeral anyway?

There can only be one site that all of this came from and that is Craigslist.

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