The following is a very Special Public Service Announcement presented by your friends here at The Buzz Kill Magazine. If this were an actual Public Service Announcement it would be followed up by an After School Special interrupting an episode of the Jerry Springer show where the Black Panthers and the KKK joined forces to talk about how horrible The Westboro Baptist Church is. And now a very special PSA.
The last time I checked my watch, or any sort of calendar for that matter, we were in the year 2015. I think this is a question that needs to be asked. How in the hell are people still duped by you are going to have to pay for Facebook posts? Seriously about once a year something starts to trend on Facebook about how horrible the world is, and then you are going to have to pay to use the social media service. If you do not comply with these rules Mark Zuckerburg will bring back the corpse of Tom from Myspace to eat your first born chicken fried. (Disclaimer, I am not sure if Tom likes fried chicken.) I am seriously wondering how we have evolved to still being tricked by the same thing since 2005. Hell, that is the equivalent of playing peek-a-boo with Helen freaking Keller and hoping one day she actually is able to see you. I am not sure how this keeps happening. It seems that one gullible person, the same person who possibly believes that Publishers Clearing House will show up on their door step on Super Bowl Sunday, sees a post from 5 years ago. The reason this status is even showing up is because someone is Facebook stalking someone else liking every status and photo ever. Do not deny you haven’t done it, it is legal stalking. Thank you internet. I digress. The person starts to have a panic attack because how else are they going to know the 24 Celebrities that will cause you to have a better bowel movement if you look at their high school prom pictures or A child looked outside the window and you will never guess what happens next? You know what happens next, the child sees fucking dirt. The same damn dirt that we used to eat. It is time to stop falling for this crap. Eventually, we are going to log on to our page, scroll down our wall and see something that will make us proud. A Man Sees a Post that is hoax, what he does next is common sense. But until the day that happens I am going to yearn for the days of Yahoo Chatrooms, at least I knew the beautiful women I was talking to were men with neckbeards. Cue “The More You Know” graphic and find some common sense.