A Teenage Boy Blames Cheerleader Skirts for impure thoughts……WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?
Many, many moons ago in a land far away where the water will kill a Britta filter instantly, I was a teenager. An as a teenager I was able to get up at the butt crack of 7:30. I was able to get dressed in less than 10 seconds and if I ever snuck into a girls house for that romantic first time I would have been covered if her Dad came up the stairs. And I would drag myself to school. And there were people dressed in all kinds of outfits, most of which may have involved those blasted platform sandals, FUBU shirts, and even dare I say peasant shirts and shiny pants. I was never distracted By these things. Sure I had impure thoughts, but I was going through puberty. I had more growth in my pants Back then than a farmer with a field of corn after a rainy season. And that is why this WTF just confuses the shit out of me. A teen in Utah is bothered by the impure thoughts that he was apparently having because of cheerleaders. I know that I found cheerleaders to be very attractive at that age. I am not sure if that made me normal or not, chances are that may have been the only thing that was normal about me. He started having these impure thoughts and instead of keeping them to himself or discussing the attractiveness of said cheerleaders with his best bro, he does something that should get your man card revoked. This Utah teen decides to do his best Norman Bates and tell his mom that cheerleaders are causing him problems. I have questions and maybe it is too much for the mind to handle, but I would like to know one other man in their teenage years that shared getting a boner with their mom. I am not sure that is something to just randomly bring up in conversation.
“Richard, how was school today?”
“Well, mom. I learned the Pythagorean Theorem, I read some of The Scarlet Letter, I popped a boner, and learned that in 1492 Columbus discovered America.”
I am not sure that is something that needs to be discussed while eating ribs. However, this mother decided to totally throw a BF and write a stern letter to the high school. She discussed her son’s impure thoughts to the school board and the reason for these impure thoughts? The cheerleading skirt. Not the top, that sometimes shows a little belly button, no, the skirt that the school itself approves of as perfect appropriate school attire. Either this teen really has thing for legs or deep down really wants to wear the uniform. Tell me if I am wrong. The school alerted the cheer coach, and the team is no longer allowed to wear their uniforms to school on game days. Our school did this as well, and sometimes the girls would wear the uniforms with windbreaker pants underneath the skirt. It gets cold in Missouri too.
And the girls stood up for their sport. (And if you tell me it’s not a sport, try it.) By saying to a news station in the area,
“It’s giving this boy power that when he grows up and does something to a girl, he can blame it on her skirt being too short,” another told People. “It really made me angry. Why should this boy have control over what we wear?”
What gives this teen a license to decide what people wear? I assume that the child is not Tim Gunn so outside that, his opinions should be just that an opinion. I was able to get through school with girls all around me, and so should every other boy. I feel this teen’s parents have an option so he won’t become so distracted during school, home school his ass. It’s that simple because something tells me the school is not going to be banning girls anytime soon.