So, I have been on the hunt for the greatest Christmas gift and that leads me to one place. Sure, I could go on Amazon to find it. Any twit with a cell phone can do that. I want some damn difficulty with my shopping. I could go on eBay but again I want a challenge. It would be like going to the Moonlight Bunny Ranch for my first time. Sure, I could do that, but who wants to pay for it for the first time. I am not someone who lives off of Mom and Dad till I am in mid 40s. No. I am going to the land of the shady deal, I am going to the greatest place on Earth. And it is not Disney. Its Craigslist!!! It’s time for the very special Christmas Edition of It Came from Craigslist. This is where I dive into the deepest corners of Craigslist to find the weirdest things for your Christmas shopping list. Let us begin our deep dive into the crevasses of the online equivalent of an STD.
Well, If I happened to be a homeless starving man whose Ex-wife took all of his dignity and was living off of a snowmobile, this would be one hell of a trade. However, that dinner may cost about $100. The only way this is a fair trade is if the turkey somehow happened to be the one pardoned by the president. I don’t care if your Granny blew Colonel Sanders on the battlefield, that trade is not happening.
Have you always dreamed of living in a world that is the same day in and day out? Have you always dreamed of shitting on cut up newspaper while living in a cage? Chances are if you said yes, you may want to hide that from your mother that you have a mistress. I am not sure what I would with a Human Hamster wheel other than recreating the One Ton Human Hamster Wheel from the obstacle course on Double Dare.
A crystal that powers up when your bro jackoffs? I think somehow this may be the premise of using the Force in way that not even the Jedi could have thought of. I don’t know about you, but I feel knowing when your best friend is playing one handed Yahtzee is something that I feel is best left the government.
And I am keeping the sex tradition alive, as I power up my bros crystal.
The Internet would not be the same without Craigslist!