Dear Santa,
I hope you are doing well this year and staying safe. I secretly hope your hand sanitizer smells like a fresh cinnamon roll on Christmas morning. I also heard the news that Dr. Fauci gave you the first shot of the Covid Vaccine. I know I will not get answer from you, but I really hope it does not hurt. I am kind of a puss when it comes to needles. I might runaway as fast as I can when I am around those things.
Christmas seems to be wrapped around the notion of what an individual wants as a present. But I can say for the first time in my life, it does not feel right writing a letter in hopes that my life is filled with more stuff.
For Christmas, I would like you to make Christmas the best day you possibly can for those who are dealing with loss this year. I never thought we would be sitting at the end of the year talking about a pandemic that took the lives of over a million people worldwide this year.
I think about my friend back home who lost her mother due to complications from COVID. I guess you could have referred to her as the girlfriend from elementary. Hell, I remember the teachers telling me I need to play with friends who are boys at recess. Her mom was one of the people who helped that town feel like a home. I remember going to their house when she only lived a field length away. (For the record, field length is small town for blocks.) My friend and her family deserve to have a Christmas to help keep her mom’s memory going and put a smile on their faces.
I think about my brother from another mother who is laying in a hospital bed battling a bone infection in his foot. Being alone in a hospital during a pandemic is not the ideal way to spend Christmas or any day for that matter. But I am asking you to help him get better. I am not sure where my life would be right now if he were not in it.
I think about my biological dad who is also laying in a hospital bed for the past month dealing with complications from surgeries. Our relationship is strained. At one point, I never thought that fence would be mended. But we have talked a few times, I still worry about sitting down with him discussing anything, but I would love to have one more chance to reconcile that relationship.
I think about the people who are working on the frontlines who I am close too. The people who are risking their lives to make sure our lives can move along normally. The nurses, the truck drivers, grocery store workers, and many more. I want their Christmas’s to reflect how much they mean to all of us. While I know some who will belittle these people for doing their job, they are essential in making sure we are able to function.
And I guess that leaves what I am asking for Christmas. I have contemplated this for the past few weeks and even months. At the beginning of the year, I sat on my couch wondering if anyone would even realize I was gone. The depression and sadness that filled my heart is something that I had never felt before in my life. In May, I finally took a step in the right direction to work on myself. That is something that the wife has been pushing for years, I should have listened sooner. So, I am asking for my Friends. It might be months before we can see anyone. I feel as if I am a burden to call or text anyone due to everything else going on in the world. Talking about nerd stuff and craving salty things seems trivial. And I know it’s not, but when you turn on the news and it just breaks your heart, it just seems like talking about anything is wrong. So, hopefully when this is done, we can have a game night, or go spend a night somewhere random without a care in the world. That would be the perfect Christmas present.
I wouldn’t mind seeing snow on Christmas, but I know the Cowboys have a better chance of winning the Super Bowl.
Thank you, Santa! Please wear a mask this year. And I am leaving your favorite cookie and chocolate milk beer. You deserve it.
Love Richard.
